Wednesday, July 4, 2012

One Giant's Leap for Creationists

I read with some disappointment that the Caleb foundation have persuaded the UK National Trust to include a Young Earth Creationist interpretation of the formation of the Giant's Causeway in Antrim. I decided to ask for equal time for a Druidic interpretation. I'll let you know if either group get back to me. (Side note - people tend to not reply to my e-mails.)

Dear friends at the National Trust and Caleb Foundation,

I write to congratulate you on your recent collaboration to ensure a Young Earth Creationist viewpoint is given prominence at the Giant's Causeway interpretive centre in Antrim. I'm sure you share my view that science has brought us many wonderful benefits and would not seek to stand against it. I feel you likely share my view that science is a useful tool, but that too often the blinkers of the majority opinion mean we see only one possible interpretation of the evidence.

I, too, represent a group that seeks to understand scientific discoveries with proper respect and in the context of my beliefs. Although not a Young Earth Creationist, or indeed a Christian, I have been impressed with the Caleb Foundation's ability to make a case against overwhelming scientific consensus, and the National Trust's willingness to be open to other viewpoints.

My group has experienced much the same discrimination and, dare I say it, mockery as the Caleb Foundation. I represent the Dublin branch of Na Fianna, an organisation devoted to maintaining the traditional ways of the poets, warriors, Druids and kings of old Ireland.

It has not been a positive few years for us - as with many, the economic downturn has hit us rather hard and a legal battle with a political party that unjustly uses our name has proven rather costly. Our sacred ceremony, the thumbing of the salmon of knowledge, has been severely curtailed by the 2006 ban on salmon fishing and our requests for a religious exemption have fallen on deaf ears. We try to make do with frozen Alaskan salmon, but the experience is not quite the same and some of the Druids feel the ceremony is incomplete. (Did you know that there is now a proven link between the fatty oils in salmon and increased brain function? It just goes to show the wonders that science can contribute to religious belief!)

I fear I've digressed. The modern scientific interpretation says that 60 million years ago molten basalt was forced through chalk beds, forming the distinctive columns we see today at the Giant's Causeway. Let me state that this is a perfectly fair interpretation of the facts if you come to the matter from an agiantist perspective. Indeed, the giant rock hurling hypothesis does not require any significant modification to the existing scientific model. It may very well be that this molten basalt growth is exactly what happened - in Scotland!

For evidence, look at the identical columns on Staffa island off the Scottish coast. This strengthens our case considerably. It's perfectly conceivable that a giant, hurling a stone column of that size and weight, would have adopted a technique similar to what is found in modern Highland games. The elevation and velocity required to move such weight over such a long distance would have resulted in extreme temperatures on re-entry, allowing for some return to a molten state before landing in its new home and recooling next to other columns.

I ask the National Trust to consider, in addition to the mildly patronising but very well produced details on Irish history, including some of the scientific theories backing our legitimate interpretation of the evidence available to us. 

And I ask the Caleb foundation to hear us out. We are of different faiths but we share a belief in giants. Amos 2:9-10 describes an Amorite thusly:
Yet it was I who destroyed the Amorite before them, whose height was like the height of the cedars, and he was as strong as the oaks
In Deuteronomy, we see further evidence of giants:
For only Og king of Bashan remained of the remnant of giants; behold his bedstead was a bedstead of iron; is it not in Rabbath of the children of Ammon? nine cubits was the length thereof, and four cubits the breadth of it, after the cubit of a man.
If my maths is correct this puts him at over thirteen feet! And naturally, we have Goliath, a man of towering height, capable of carrying extensive weight in weapons and armor, and quite likely capable of hurling large rocks.

If you are willing to give us a fair hearing I can have our Druids and researchers put together an information pack for your perusal. I'm sure as that your trust would not wish to be seen to favour one religion over another, and I feel that the Caleb foundation's experiences and our shared belief in giants will mean, despite our differences, that we can work together.

With best wishes,

Rígfénnid Geoff

Addendum: they've replied. Read more.


Peter Ferguson said...

It would be great if they took your request seriously and why shouldn't they, your explanation regarding the origin of the causeway has as much credence as the creationists' one. However, for the creationist view to be taken seriously I wonder if they have some sort of political pull because I do not understand why the National Trust would consider it except some misguided sense of political correctness, a worrying trend in Europe.

RJMacready said...

are you for real? what is with the world and the nutjobs who populate it athat think we all descend from bloody faires, aliens, moonmins, adam & eve, xenu etc...

wake up and smell the evolutionary truth you muppets

Geoff said...

Peter, I fear that the Caleb foundation is simply better funded than my fian.

RJ, my fian doesn't hold to an official position on evolution. Some accept it enthusiastically. Others feel it was guided by the varies, others reject it, but all viewpoints are accepted.

Besides, as I understand it, there's nothing in evolutionary theory that precludes a race of giants. Our views are compatible!

RJMacready said...

Surely the notion of "giants" and "magical man in the sky" is a wee bit silly to anyone who doesnt spend they're days licking the walls.

I mean come on mate, you may as well take Harry Potter as your bible to beleive such nonsense

RjMacready said...

I’ll point you to this article in which the author takes a more reasoned & rationale approach to explaining your insanity better than I ever could

John said...

"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

Science doesn't know everything.

Geoff said...

I feel my views are as sensible as those of the Caleb Foundation and equally worthy of the National Trust's support.

Shane said...

Yiz are all heretics; if Druidism and Young Earth Creationism are being included, then I wish to see the GLBT community represented too. GLBT stands for Giant Lava-secreting Bee Theory, and it is supported by ALL the evidence, not just the cherry-picked and distorted morsels of the "creationists" or the evolutionists.

As we can prove, millions of years ago this planet was populated by a race of giant lava-secreting bees. In Noah's Flood they were so soaked that they all died, but their lavacombs are with us still in the form of the Giant's Causeway.

Even today, members of the GLBT community revere these stones, and come down to them to pay homage to their creators.

I demand, in the interests of Section 75 and the Good Friday Agreement, that GLBT views are given equal status to those of creationists.

RjMacready said...

Sensible? It staggers me that you think yours and the views of the Caleb foundation are anything but the ramblings of a lunatic few.. how can you possibly argue against science FACT with made up stories and fairytales, I assume you also believe in the easter bunny, tooth fairy and father Christmas? If not why not?

RjMacready said...

To be fair the Giant Bee theory sounds more plausible than those of a magical man in the sky deciding 4000yrs ago to make the earth or that off Giants with too much time on their hands getting jiggy with a few rocks & flint hammer.

Geoff said...

Shane, I'll be courteous and assume you're not trying to make a parody of my beliefs. If this is something you truly hold dear then we have room to work together.

There may even be scope for sharing costs.

Between us we can present all interpretations and let the public decide for themselves!

Geoff said...

RJ, ramblings of a lunatic few? How do you explain reported sightings of giants in all cultures worldwide? How do you explain the proven link between a diet rich in salmon has a proven boosting effect on IQ, as predicted by our sacred texts?

The Caleb Foundation may seem a little unorthodox, I'll admit, and believing that the earth is 7.5 thousand years old is something even I find a smidge bemusing. Bu surely there's room at the table for all our views?

Jr said...

I suspect the fact that the First Minister's party include a lot of creationists had a lot to do with the inclusion.

Ironically isn't that the unionist party would disparage the work of famous British scientists like Hutton and Lyell.

the chip monk said...

RJMacready...grab your dictionary, and look up the word 'satire'.